Mindset Workout: Ignoring Muscle
I’ve been playing with this concept of an Ignoring Muscle for well over 15 years, and as we are confronted with more and more in-your-face media and messaging, its relevance has also increased. Scroll on down to see an old Beach Walks with Rox episode that I’ve embedded for your flashback fun.It’s been said we are living in the Attention Economy and of course, you know so many examples of YouTubers and TikTokers who are making big bank by producing regular entertainment for “us.” If we older people thought traditional advertising was intrusive (billboards everywhere, ads every few minutes on our favorite TV shows, etc.) it’s minuscule compared to the constant “look at me” hawking by influencers.Sadly, it also falls under the notion of “agency” — as in “I TikTok therefore I am” to bastardize Descartes’ quote. There is little thinking in so much of this media-making, in my opinion, and a whole lotta survivalism panic that people truly do not feel they exist (or have a right to exist) if they are not seen and Liked. I can relate. Not only was I an early adopter of blogging and social media, but I am here publishing weekly on Substack.They too pitch this platform as a place to achieve literary and financial autonomy, but as has pointed out, the famous stay famous and the unfamous struggle for attention and $ubscribers.
That all sounds great! Substack connects readers to writers allowing the latter to build “livelihoods and communities. There are no editors; there are no gatekeepers. It’s just me and you here; creating unfiltered knowledge and genuine connection, together. Sounds cool, right?It does sound cool. It also sounds like a lot of other sales pitches which frame empowerment as self-direction, flexibility, and liberation from the tyranny of bosses and guaranteed healthcare. Substack, in short, is speaking the language of neoliberalism.
Even though I was an early video blogger/youtuber, who achieved over 2.5 million downloads, I never was able to “monetize” the show. I used to think I was too early.Now I think two things:
- I just don’t have the shill gene. ♀️
- Feel-good content is not as neurologically compelling.
I would love for more of you readers to spot me $5/month for my efforts here for us to feel better together by becoming more conscious humans. I refuse to use Substack chat, because nothing here falls under the “urgent” banner and I am in favor of fewer interruptions and notifications, not more!I’d love to engage in thoughtful conversations with you using the Notes feature but based on the poll results about Chat a few weeks ago, my best guess is that many of you don’t know it exists. And again, it’s a slippery slope between wanting to engage and the necessity of being on yet another social platform to do that.So this is my long-winded way of saying, I am writing for the collective us; you did not demand I do it. I think there are huge benefits in ignoring many of your “incomings” be they phone, text, inbox, or social spaces. This is why developing the Ignoring Muscle Group is so useful.I like thinking of it as a muscle because muscles bring strength, but are most helpful when they are also flexible, not rigid. And muscles are something that we can build by using intention, by being willing to do some hard stuff like not being a lemming.Plus, building muscles is not a ‘one and done’ activity. To stay strong, we must workout on a regular basis. Learning to curate your social spaces is an evolving activity, for which a maintenance plan is as important as the decision to get in shape.Then there is the effect out in the world of our collective muscle-building: we literally starve the stuff we are not interested in of attention, which is energy, which is the fuel that allows that stuff to expand. So ignoring the crap helps us feel better AND it slowly starts shrinking the crap out in the world. How cool is that?Like any workout, I ask you to both go easy on yourself and be willing to suffer a little. The platforms are designed to create addictions. We know that, but I think we still underestimate how powerful it is. I know for me, this is true. I find breaking news utterly fascinating! But I feel better when I have desirable due dates that stop me from getting sucked in. Just like a successful workout routine often means bundling it with other things you do automagically, or, making dates with fitness buddies.May you have an inspired and challenging week! May you start by making a list of things you can ignore this week or times you turn off the feeds! May some of your ignoring coincide with the delicious luxury of being in nature!xorox